November

My birthday is in the fall - as is my mother's. She will be 82 this November 1st. Her winter has arrived and she hasn't any more seasons to look forward to. The Hospice nurses comfort her as well as they can but she is restless and unhappy. "Why am I still living when all the joy is gone. Why do some people slip effortlessly away and I stuggle each day in pain?"

In one of his hymns, Isaac Watts penned this poignant line: "Time, like an ever-rolling stream, bears all its sons away; they fly, forgotten, as a dream dies at the op'ning day." The significant people, times and places of the seasons of our lives come and go, leaving only memories—until time bears even those away.

I assure my mother that she will be remembered - and the memories of places she loved and the home she built for us will be passed on to grandchildren and great grandchildren.

The writer of Ecclesiastes is right: each season and purpose of life has its proper place in God's grand scheme. Sometimes we just don't understand the grand scheme.

The autumn of life

"There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven—a time to give birth and a time to die . . . a time to weep and a time to laugh . . . a time to keep and a time to throw away."
(Ecclesiastes 3:1ff)

This is a beautiful fall day. The kind that recalls past years and walks in the leaves with little boys and dogs. I find myself called outside just to walk in the clear, crisp days with the color and swirl of leaves all around. The autumn of life has a similar feeling - you know it will pass quickly and you want to savor each day; to slow it down and fix the memories in your mind. Winter is coming.

Though autumn is my favorite time, I actually look forward to each season of the year and welcome the inevitable, predictable changes it will bring. I am thinking this should also be so with the seasons of life.

While I miss those past summer days of my life, autumn brings its own unique perspectives and pleasures. The pace is slower and crunching fallen leaves underfoot without the ever-pressing responsibility of rearing small children imparts a different sort of joy.

I'm content to be in autumn and do not wish to relive spring or summer. Memories of them still linger—and suffice.

October birthdays

What a beautiful day for a birthday! I have always loved October days - even the rainy ones. There is a promise of cooler mornings and crisp nights. Over the years we have had October in some very different places. Today, I am remembering a hot October 8th, a few years back, in the Arizona sun. We had purchased a house with an olive tree in the front yard and a high adobe wall around the back and moved in a few months earlier with our cats. The third bedroom was decorated in yellow checks and red gingham, my old crib painted red, a rocking chair in place, and tiny baby clothes folded in the dresser. We had passed our Lamaze class with flying colors and expectant grandma was on notice. The doctor said - don't go far! At my appointment on Monday he decided enough was enough and asked us to come to St. Joseph's hospital in downtown Phoenix, Maricopa County. At five, the next morning, my water broke - but since we were going in anyway, we didn't think to notify the doctor. The rush hour drive into town was a bit hectic. All I remember is a pillow on my lap. We arrived at our 8 am appointment. Just in time - as the baby was born at 8:20 with an intern in attendance!
We were so proud - and he was so beautiful. Pictures show how very special we felt. We knew, somehow, how much this baby would change our lives. That sounds so cliche, but it is so true! We were so ready to be parents - I look back now and think that was just because we had no idea what it entailed! Today the baby is a father - understanding more what we thought when we brought him home in that air-conditioned car to our little house in the Arizona desert. He has traveled far since then - experiencing adventures we could never have imagined. He is a kind, thoughtful, creative, and independent person - constantly surprising and teaching us with his opinions and concerns. He really did change our lives, and continues to do so. He celebrates today with his own children, in the cool morning of a Georgia fall.
When they are born, and even when they are growing, you create a vision of how your children will turn out - what they will do and think as adults. And it is such a suprise when they aren't anything like you expected. Somehow I missed the clues along the way! I thought by my sheer will power I could turn them into my vision. Looking back I am sure my parents were also thoroughly surprised at the adults we became. The surprise is what makes life interesting. This son, born on the day between his two grandfathers, began his life as a diplomat and continues to smooth and calm our lives. Happy birthday.